Pita not PETA
I suppose it would have to happen. I knew that my path with cross with that of PETA. I was on Facebook minding my own business when a link of theirs appeared on the right hand side of my page. Facebook custom tailors their adverts based on your content, so it was only a matter of time.
What is PETA?
Now, I haven't done any research, but it figures like this... PETA is an organization founded in 1520 by Spanish conquistadors. I think that's right... Anyway, they hate people that exploit animals. That means that they do not eat ANY delicious meat or eggs, they don't consume dairy or honey... sounds vegan so far... nor to they wear wool or leather or seal-skin britches. They love animals. Their not into this lifestyle for the health benefits, just the ethics.
PETA and VEGAN are nearly synonymous. Nearly.
Vegans come in three separate varieties.
Ethical Vegans - these people could/would be willing to join PETA. To me it was always teenage girls who ascribed to this lifestyle. The sort of vapid people who would argue that cows are people too. Or that they couldn't possibly eat something with a face.
Health Vegans - these folks see the obvious health benefits of a restricted diet. This includes anyone who wants to or needs to do it. Clinton after heart surgery, my step-brother after the holiday feasts, etc...
Random Vegans - This is where I am. This group includes people who are accidental vegans, vegan explorers (me), and people without money who are forced to eat only grass.
All true PETA-ns must by definition, be Vegan, but not the other way around. In fact I fucking hate PETA. I see them for the group of simple minded nit-wits they are. Nothing they have done has ever struck me as noble or right-thinking or universally true. These people PETA people live with fear in their hearts, not love. They never made the transition from child to adult, it's stunted growth not informed thought. And no, a baby cow and a baby human are not the same thing. One is fucking delicious and the other is a cow! (Cannibal humor, hilarious...)
Biologically, meat is a part of the human diet. We are omnivorous animals. Incisors, Canines, Molars and Bicuspids. We have four kinds of teeth, and two of those types are exclusively used for eating flesh.
Historically, we ate every damn thing that crossed our paths. If not, how could you explain oysters on the half-shell. If it had a heart beat we ate it. If it grew out of the ground, we tried it. Our systems are designed to allow for a vast and diverse intake, including the flesh of a cute cow... Or a horse... I bet horse is delicious...
I'm glad that my prehistoric ancestors were neither Ethically Vegan nor PETAn. I take comfort in the thought that my great-great-great-great-great-grandfather thought fondly of his wife and children before carving up an animal carcass.
Science Fiction sometimes tackles this subject as well. In Sci Fi, the more advanced cultures are Ethically Vegan. These supremely advanced, racist asshats thumb their nose at humanity and talk down to us because of how 'young' our race is or at how savage we appear... And then some human blasts their face off with a phaser.
I suppose it would have to happen. I knew that my path with cross with that of PETA. I was on Facebook minding my own business when a link of theirs appeared on the right hand side of my page. Facebook custom tailors their adverts based on your content, so it was only a matter of time.
What is PETA?
Now, I haven't done any research, but it figures like this... PETA is an organization founded in 1520 by Spanish conquistadors. I think that's right... Anyway, they hate people that exploit animals. That means that they do not eat ANY delicious meat or eggs, they don't consume dairy or honey... sounds vegan so far... nor to they wear wool or leather or seal-skin britches. They love animals. Their not into this lifestyle for the health benefits, just the ethics.
PETA and VEGAN are nearly synonymous. Nearly.
Vegans come in three separate varieties.
Ethical Vegans - these people could/would be willing to join PETA. To me it was always teenage girls who ascribed to this lifestyle. The sort of vapid people who would argue that cows are people too. Or that they couldn't possibly eat something with a face.
Health Vegans - these folks see the obvious health benefits of a restricted diet. This includes anyone who wants to or needs to do it. Clinton after heart surgery, my step-brother after the holiday feasts, etc...
Random Vegans - This is where I am. This group includes people who are accidental vegans, vegan explorers (me), and people without money who are forced to eat only grass.
All true PETA-ns must by definition, be Vegan, but not the other way around. In fact I fucking hate PETA. I see them for the group of simple minded nit-wits they are. Nothing they have done has ever struck me as noble or right-thinking or universally true. These people PETA people live with fear in their hearts, not love. They never made the transition from child to adult, it's stunted growth not informed thought. And no, a baby cow and a baby human are not the same thing. One is fucking delicious and the other is a cow! (Cannibal humor, hilarious...)
Biologically, meat is a part of the human diet. We are omnivorous animals. Incisors, Canines, Molars and Bicuspids. We have four kinds of teeth, and two of those types are exclusively used for eating flesh.
Historically, we ate every damn thing that crossed our paths. If not, how could you explain oysters on the half-shell. If it had a heart beat we ate it. If it grew out of the ground, we tried it. Our systems are designed to allow for a vast and diverse intake, including the flesh of a cute cow... Or a horse... I bet horse is delicious...
I'm glad that my prehistoric ancestors were neither Ethically Vegan nor PETAn. I take comfort in the thought that my great-great-great-great-great-grandfather thought fondly of his wife and children before carving up an animal carcass.
Science Fiction sometimes tackles this subject as well. In Sci Fi, the more advanced cultures are Ethically Vegan. These supremely advanced, racist asshats thumb their nose at humanity and talk down to us because of how 'young' our race is or at how savage we appear... And then some human blasts their face off with a phaser.
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| Vegan, Vegan, what's the difference? |
I secretly desire to have PETAns mauled by wild animals. And it could actually happen. Check this out.
My Wisconsin cousins kill animals for sport and food. One of the many things that my cousins chose to hunt is black bear. I myself have gone with them up to the hunting cabin many times as a child to help them prepare for killing bears. Those are some of my fondest childhood memories... anyway, I was never there when a beast was taken down. These were just weekend long dry runs. Practice.
On a recent trip to see my family, my cousin Brad drunkenly expressed, as best as he could, that he himself hates PETA for a reason I hadn't known about. In the state of Wisconsin, you need a license to kill a black bear. State wildlife experts determine how many animals should be killed in a given year and issue licenses based on those numbers. For example, if state wildlife officials thought that there was a population explosion in bears, to the point where they would be interacting with humanity, they would issue a number a licenses equal to the overage. No Kill Bear = Suzy gets mauled in the backyard by a hungry bear.
There are a lot of groups that vie for these licenses. Recently the number of licenses has remained fairly high. The reason being? PETA has been paying people in the state of Wisconsin to apply for the licenses and to not kill bears. If the state were going to lottery off 300 licenses, well over half would be going to PETA. That's 150 more chances for bears to cross paths with humanity because PETA cannot allow a sensible culling of the herd.
Nit-Wits.
Of course, that doesn't stop my cousins from getting their licenses and doing their civic duty.
Here's a picture of my cousin Brian with a friend of his. This is what happens when you win the lottery in Wisconsin. ...PETA does not approve this message.
Good times... Where was I?
Oh yeah, PETA blows. But they do have some excellent ads.
Adam
My Wisconsin cousins kill animals for sport and food. One of the many things that my cousins chose to hunt is black bear. I myself have gone with them up to the hunting cabin many times as a child to help them prepare for killing bears. Those are some of my fondest childhood memories... anyway, I was never there when a beast was taken down. These were just weekend long dry runs. Practice.
On a recent trip to see my family, my cousin Brad drunkenly expressed, as best as he could, that he himself hates PETA for a reason I hadn't known about. In the state of Wisconsin, you need a license to kill a black bear. State wildlife experts determine how many animals should be killed in a given year and issue licenses based on those numbers. For example, if state wildlife officials thought that there was a population explosion in bears, to the point where they would be interacting with humanity, they would issue a number a licenses equal to the overage. No Kill Bear = Suzy gets mauled in the backyard by a hungry bear.
There are a lot of groups that vie for these licenses. Recently the number of licenses has remained fairly high. The reason being? PETA has been paying people in the state of Wisconsin to apply for the licenses and to not kill bears. If the state were going to lottery off 300 licenses, well over half would be going to PETA. That's 150 more chances for bears to cross paths with humanity because PETA cannot allow a sensible culling of the herd.
Nit-Wits.
Of course, that doesn't stop my cousins from getting their licenses and doing their civic duty.
I still do not know why my cousin Brian has his shirt off...
Here's a picture of my cousin Brian with a friend of his. This is what happens when you win the lottery in Wisconsin. ...PETA does not approve this message.
This is me eating that bear. Yum!
Good times... Where was I?
Oh yeah, PETA blows. But they do have some excellent ads.
Adam



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