There's no mystical energy field controlling my destiny...
There is a pot luck at work tomorrow. They do this about four or five times a year, it's a morale booster and an opportunity for the ladies to one-up each other in the cooking department.Make no mistake, it's a competition. The loser gets fucking fired. No joke. But that's office politics...
Someone asked me if was going to participate. I thought about it, and for a moment I forgot I was vegan. Evidently, being vegan is forgettable. I mean, I still have to be ever vigilant that I don't ingest murder and/or exploitation but after I read a label, it's all smooth sailing. I was able to get out of this socially awkward food event be using the Vegan card. (The Vegan Card is actually quite beautiful. It's a watercolor of a little girl in a bonnet, collecting strawberries in a basket, as a Holstein cow eats happily in a nearby meadow. In a brilliant embossed script it has the words "STOP EXPLOITING COWS YOU FUCKING FUCK" across the bottom.)
Anyway, I listened as my coworkers schemed a way to get the protein for tomorrow. They plan on getting as much fried chicken as $5 a piece can get them.
I know these women. I spend a huge amount of time with them everyday. I know about their personal lives.. their friends, their families and... their various medical conditions. There is nothing about the health of my coworkers that would be made better with fried chicken.
I'm not an enemy of meat. Meat and I are still really close old friends. But I see this, this Fried Chicken Compact, as a horrible choice. There are many other options that would have benefited everyone in a way delicious fried chicken can't.
I will miss not having any of what Sharon is bringing. Remember when I said, It's a competition? Sharon is the winner every time.
Spread, Bean
I have a lot of the ingredients needed to make some really excellent bean spread. I have spent a long time looking at recipes online and it boils down to this.
I had been waiting till tonight to make mine. My mother was getting me her spare food processor which happen to have once belonged to my great grandmother. The blades on my loaner food processor are dull and it's not making smooth anything. It also has about as much power as me sitting in my chair at work. I made a Bean Spread, it was yummy and I am bringing it for lunch tomorrow.
Unnecessary Adjective: Opinionated Vegan.
There is a pot luck at work tomorrow. They do this about four or five times a year, it's a morale booster and an opportunity for the ladies to one-up each other in the cooking department.Make no mistake, it's a competition. The loser gets fucking fired. No joke. But that's office politics...
Someone asked me if was going to participate. I thought about it, and for a moment I forgot I was vegan. Evidently, being vegan is forgettable. I mean, I still have to be ever vigilant that I don't ingest murder and/or exploitation but after I read a label, it's all smooth sailing. I was able to get out of this socially awkward food event be using the Vegan card. (The Vegan Card is actually quite beautiful. It's a watercolor of a little girl in a bonnet, collecting strawberries in a basket, as a Holstein cow eats happily in a nearby meadow. In a brilliant embossed script it has the words "STOP EXPLOITING COWS YOU FUCKING FUCK" across the bottom.)
Anyway, I listened as my coworkers schemed a way to get the protein for tomorrow. They plan on getting as much fried chicken as $5 a piece can get them.
I know these women. I spend a huge amount of time with them everyday. I know about their personal lives.. their friends, their families and... their various medical conditions. There is nothing about the health of my coworkers that would be made better with fried chicken.
I'm not an enemy of meat. Meat and I are still really close old friends. But I see this, this Fried Chicken Compact, as a horrible choice. There are many other options that would have benefited everyone in a way delicious fried chicken can't.
I will miss not having any of what Sharon is bringing. Remember when I said, It's a competition? Sharon is the winner every time.
Spread, Bean
I have a lot of the ingredients needed to make some really excellent bean spread. I have spent a long time looking at recipes online and it boils down to this.
- Take a canned bean. (It doesn't matter what kind... Just not soy. Stop that.)
- Add come citrus.
- Add a nut butter or oil of your choice
- Put some flavor in it... (Pesto, Garlic, Spice, Herbs, Chilis, etc....)
- Whip the shit out out of it.
I had been waiting till tonight to make mine. My mother was getting me her spare food processor which happen to have once belonged to my great grandmother. The blades on my loaner food processor are dull and it's not making smooth anything. It also has about as much power as me sitting in my chair at work. I made a Bean Spread, it was yummy and I am bringing it for lunch tomorrow.
Unnecessary Adjective: Opinionated Vegan.
Comments
Post a Comment